Thanks to all the learned gentlemen who've offered advice to me after yesterday's post. This morning, after taking in all the great advice, I decided that it was best to have the whole story pencilled - I've got plenty of inked stuff and I felt it was better to tell the whole thing rather than look flaky and only have the start and finish. Here then, are the finished pencils.
Page two:
Page three:
I think these are ok for the showing to good old Tharg... I hope he likes them!
I won't be inking any of them, although I do have time tomorrow, because I'm going to get acquainted with my portfolio, print out a few samples for potential hand-outs and I'd like to do something about my business card - although I think it will probably just end up being a case of printing some more of the old one...
Wish me luck friends - I'll post again after BICS!
4 comments:
Good luck at BICS mate, knock em dead!
Wish I was there!
Something wrong with the world if you don't get really good feedback (or a paying gig!)from all your efforts. Best of luck Kev.
Really well handled camera angles inside the cramped car Kev. The changing viewpoints don't in any way hamper the narrative, in fact you follow the action perfectly! Love the dynamics of the crash on page three, although for me (just my humble opinion) the high angle view in panel 4 doesn't quite earn it's keep. The viewer hops up for this view then down and in for the close up...I feel like it breaks the flow a little. Just a small quibble, I still love what you've achieved with this!!!
I really like what you've done and the improved panels you posted in the next blog entry do work better.
Lots of very nice things going on there - the second panel on page 2 for example.
I especially like what you did with the first panel on page 3 - breaking out of the panel helps add to to the feel. I'd like to see more... "tinkering" with the panels. Perhaps have the gun flash in the final panel of page two break out of the panel (might work nicely as a pointer to the next page). I wonder if you make the top of the first panel on page 3 a slight angle parallel with the top of the roof (I wonder if you could carry it over to the second panel and take a slice out of the top left corner. Just mix it up a little.
Matt has a point about the third panel on page 4 but perhaps it isn't that one we should be looking at. I don't know what the script says but you could keep that angle in that panel but in the fifth one have it part way between the fourth and the sixth, as though you have a crane mounted camera starting high, then sweeping down and zooming in. So the fifth panel might be looking through the open car door at the woman, then the last panel moves close in.
Anyway good stuff - none of that needs doing but it is something to bear in mind further down the line.
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